There are times in my life where I feel overwhelmed with the level of leadership I have been given. While I feel honored that God would place me in the position I am in as a mother, a wife, and a pastor’s wife, I feel schizophrenic. Some days, I feel confident that can embrace my position and be greatly used by God, but other days I worry that I am going to fail. What if people think I am more spiritual than I really am?
The times when my fear of failure is the greatest are the seasons in my life where I am overcommitted and spread too thin. I can never allow myself to become more wide than I am deep, spiritually speaking.
When I feel myself heading in a direction where I am spending so much time leading others and caring for others that I am not spending any time personally in God’s Word, I know that it is time for me to pull back. Yes, it is ok to have seasons of busyness, but if my busy season lasts month after month after month, I know that I will find myself in a place of fear and failure.
Confidence in who God has called me to be can really only come from God himself. So often, when I find myself in a dry space, I seek for that encouragement from others, because I have made no time to let God pour into me, and I still feel empty.
Awareness is the first step. Knowing that I have committed to too much and am spread too thin. Intentionality is the second step. Learning to pull back, say no, and make sure that I am freeing myself up to spend time in God’s Word on a consistent basis.
Overflow is the goal. I want to live my life in such a way that God pours into me and it overflows into my leadership, my mothering, and my relationship with my husband. I like the way Paul said it…